Unveiling My Purpose: The Whys That Unlock Life’s Passion

Join me in my journey on how the 7 Why principle helped me realize my true purpose.

I was recently listening to a summary of the book “Millionaire Success Habits’ by Dean Graziose.

The author refers to the 7 whys which can help you realize what drives you. A realization that will ensure you are always motivated.

The moment I heard this, the first thing that came to my mind was Skylar, my two-year-old, who does this almost every day.

Anybody with a toddler would know about their unlimited curiosity, and how every reply is responded to with a cute ‘Why?’.

For example, when we tell her someone is coming home, she asks why.

We tell her because they want to meet us….. again Why?

Because they are our friends…. Why?

Because we like each other….. Why?

This goes for a while before she gets distracted or we ask her the same questions back. a point at which she loses interest in the game.

But I often wonder do we stop playing the game since we don’t know the answer or our fears to delve deeper into these seemingly simple questions, which get more serious at every level.

Dean Graziose writes the 7-level deep is important because, by the 4th question, you are answering the questions from your heart, not your brain.

This blog is my attempt at answering my 7 whys to find my purpose for the various things I do.

Use this as a reference in discovering your purpose.

1. Why Do I Want Additional Sources Of Income?

Why am I working so hard to set up additional sources of income?

This seems to be easy. I want to set up additional income sources so that I am not completely dependent on an external entity I cannot control (my employer) to ensure my livelihood is sustained.

2. Why Do I Don’t Want To Depend On My Employer?

If you have been following my blogs you might know moving to the US was something I always dreamed about as a kid. A dream that came true in 2013, the only problem, my presence there was conditional to my employer wanting me there, and my H1b visa.

In about 6 years I lived there I had to go for a visa renewal about 3 times. Every time it was to be through my employer. My employer had strong control over my life, their incompetency or competency decided whether I continue to live my dream.

I could move to a different employer, but that would have only passed the rein to a different rider.

Every time my visa went for renewal, I used to have sleepless nights. I was helpless as I depended on someone else’s competency to steer the direction of my life.

Living in the US for about 6 years further enforced my belief that if I had to go back to India unwillingly, I would be deemed a failure, it became my worst-case scenario.

3. Why Could I Not Go Back To India?

India is a beautiful place and is where I was born and brought up.

India would probably become one of the richest and most developed countries within my lifetime. But in my growing up years all the American sitcoms and comics I read painted a beautiful picture of life in the Western world.

Like many other youngsters in India, going ‘abroad’ was the ultimate bragging right.

When leaving for the US many said, that someone who moves to the US never returns.

This statement subconsciously planted a seed in my mind that if I had to return, it would mean I was a failure. I had worked hard to reach where I was at that point.

I did not want to be seen as a failure, again.

4. Fear Of Being Called A Failure?

We are at the 4th question. Anything from this point onwards is moving to the territory of answers from my heart.

The year 2005 was my rock bottom. It was my birthday and the day I got my 5th-semester Engineering result, and I knew I failed, not 1 or 2 but in about 5 subjects of about 8 I had attempted that semester.

Imagine walking back to your hostel at night and getting a call, you pick it up, and it’s your parents wishing you Happy Birthday, and instead of saying thank you, you have to let them know you failed, then being told it’s okay, do not stress.

It was nerve-wracking because that was not the response I was expecting. I wanted to be scolded. I wanted my parents to be angry because I knew they were disappointed in me. But they were not showing it because they were worried about me. Since I was hundreds of kilometers away and well it was my Birthday.

I was a sincere student, I am not saying I was super studious but I was hard-working, failing so miserably was a kick to the gut.

The pain I felt also had a lot to do with the thought of disappointing my parents who were working hard every day to give me a better life. I did not want to disappoint my parents.

5. Why Did I Not Want To Disappoint My Parents?

Let me share something about my family.

I was born and brought up in a middle-class family in New Delhi, India. Luckily my life had always been comfortable. I did not live a lavish life, but my parents ensured that all our essential needs were met.

My father’s childhood was different, and he is a proper rags-to-riches story.

I feel blessed that he could give his 3 children the best education he could afford and shaped who we are today, the good and the bad, mostly good. All three of us are successful in life, and living a good life due to his sacrifices.

When I moved out of Delhi for my education he had hoped I use this opportunity to make something of my life. I felt failing to do so was a waste of all the sacrifices they made for me.

I think my father wanted me to be successful so I wouldn’t have to make the sacrifices he had to make. This is the reason the last thing I wanted was to disappoint him with my failures.

Today everything I do is to make sure the ones who believe in me, my Parents, My Wife, and hopefully My Daughter ( when she grows up) are not disappointed, or let down for believing in me.

Taking back control of my life from someone else would ensure that my successes and failures are based on my decisions.

I am not scared of owning up to my failures, but roadblock caused by my dependency on someone else is something that I am not comfortable with.

When I took control of my life after my failures I moved on, cleared 11 subjects in the next go, and joined one of the most prestigious MNCs in India.

Unfortunately, I lost control again, and 16 years later, I think it is time to take it back.

And this my friend is my true purpose in life.

Ending At 5?

I found my purpose before hitting the 7th question. This was not expected but not unheard of.

I write from my heart, nothing I write in these blogs is pre-decided forced content, but things I inherently believe.

As I embarked on this quest I was unsure where it would end.

I could have forced more questions every time to get to 7th why, but making up things that I do not believe would have been disingenuous to you. This story was not just to highlight my life, but to give you an example of a journey deep into the whys, which you can embark on too.

Finding Your Purpose

Knowing the answers to questions on your journey to find your purpose gives you the clarity you never had.

Unlike me, maybe your motivations are more nuanced.

The purpose of making this journey is to discover the deepest thoughts that you might have lost touch with.

When I was at the 4th question I had my emotions running wild, it was a moment of discovery, stuff that I had not thought about in a while.

This moment of discovery might come down earlier or later in your journey.

Maybe you get to the 7 level before you truly get your answer, the clarity you get at that point would be the motivation you need to move forward.

The 7 levels of why can be applied to everything you do.

Once you are in touch with your purpose, the mental clarity in the direction you need to go next is amazing.

So go ahead and discover your whys, and let me know in the comments how long it took you to get the true reason for the things you do.

Your Glorious Purpose.

You can follow me on @thejijogeorge on all social media platforms.